Dumping My Thoughts

This thing I'm going through, I think it has the potential to drive me insane.


I got myself into this, I know. It was because of the novelty of being abroad, the naivety of a fifteen year old girl I was, the ambitiousness I had, the desire of being independent.

Oh I'm not saying that I did not become more independent. And I'm also not saying that being abroad doesn't have any perks to it. I did get a lot of new experiences, and I met great people that I'm sure will be my good friends till years to come.

But I will be honest, that sometimes I have some thoughts that bother me. When stress finds me, I often think whether this, all this, is worth it. Is it really worth it? I wonder if people who had come before me could tell me if it is. The struggle, the 500 mile distance, the pressure, the solitude, the constant need of hardwork, the tears and frustration. Are those really worth it in the end of the four years?

I'm about to find out myself, as the end is near, I know. Maybe it's worth it. Or maybe not. I want to believe that it is, though. I hope it is.

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